Dad demands 28-year-old daughter allow her stepmom to walk her down the aisle alongside him, daughter refuses, tells him she'll ask someone else: ‘I’m only comfortable walking with him’

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    AIO for asking my dad to walk me down the aisle alone and not with his wife?

    I (28F) am getting married this fall. My dad has been remarried for about 10 years. His wife (my stepmom) is... okay. We aren't close. She's polite but distant, and we never really bonded.
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    She didn't raise me, my mom did. I asked my dad if he would walk me down the aisle, and he was thrilled. But a week later, he
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    called me and said he thinks it would be "symbolically appropriate" if he and his wife walked me down together. I was confused and asked why.
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    He said she's been in my life for "a long time" and it would mean a lot to "honor both my parents." I said I'm only comfortable walking with him, and he said “I
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    didn't think you were still holding on to resentment." I'm not resentful, I'm just not close to her. This moment means something to me. I told him he could say no, but then I'd ask my mom or grandpa instead.
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    Now he's not speaking to me. He says I'm causing drama before the wedding and being "ungrateful." My stepmom hasn't said anything, but I know she knows.
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    I feel like I'm being made to accommodate someone else's feelings in my moment. Am I overreacting?
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    chez2202 NOR. You said that stepmother hasn't said anything but you know that she knows. She knows because it was her idea.
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    Why on earth would your dad suggest that someone he married when you were 18 raised you and should walk you down the aisle with him when your ACTUAL MOTHER who DID raise you is going to be there? His strings are being
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    pulled and he is doing as his wife says. How do you think your mother would feel if you gave in to their demands and she had to watch that sh show? It wouldn't be YOUR wedding, it would be about them.
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    My advice? You should definitely have two people walk you down the aisle. The two people you already mentioned. Your mother and your grandfather.
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    Mobile-Employ3940 I went through something very similar to this. I called my dad to tell him I was getting married and inviting him to the wedding. This was barely a year after my parents got divorced.
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    He asked if his new girlfriend was invited and I said no this is for close family only. He told me he'd have to ask his girlfriend if that would be okay. And the minute he told me he had to ask his girlfriend, I knew
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    I was done. He called me back a couple days later and told me that she was fine with him coming to the wedding alone. Great because it was either alone or not at all. I have no
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    idea why these men think they have to force their affair / new wives on the original family. He doesn't need to walk you down the aisle, find somebody else. He's made his decision.
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    Puzzled-Safe4801 He's the one causing drama. Why on earth would he expect you to subject your mother to watching her daughter being walked down the aisle by someone who didn't raise her
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    or have any hand in the adult she's become? Is he kidding?? If he had suggested that both he and your mom walk you down the aisle, maybe that would make sense. But even
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    that would be an A H move because it's your choice, not his. Personally, I'd tell him he's out no matter what he says after this. Ask your mom and/or granddad or walk yourself
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    down the aisle. Whatever you want, but please don't allow yourself to be emotionally manipulated by this guy. Congratulations on your wedding and focus on your future.
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    Chuck60s NOR. I've never heard such dramatic foolishness from the father of the bride in my life. I'd ask your mom to walk you and avoid the drama here. No one should be uncomfortable at their own wedding.
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    Ok-Raspberry-5374 Not overreacting at all. You're asking for a moment with your dad? not excluding anyone, just honoring your own feelings. He's trying to center his wife in a role she didn't earn. It's your wedding, not a symbolic gesture for someone else's ego. Stand your ground.

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